Can Hate Be Healed?

This is a very intriguing question and also the title of a well-written and insightful editorial in this Sunday's Boston Globe, co-authored by Jack Levin, Director of the Brudnick Center on Violence and Conflict and Arnold Arluke, Professor of Sociology at Northeastern University.   

To quote Levin and Arluke, though we have been saying this at KnowThyNeighbor all along, " Most hate is cultural.  Normal people learn to hate from an early age from parents, teachers, friends, co-workers and the media.  They might never translate their bigotry into behavior beyond using stereotypical epithets and telling bigoted jokes.  But some hate is pathological.  It becomes so severe that it takes control of a person's life, causing him to become isolated, fearful, self-destructive, and dangerous to others.  Haq and Robida seem to have suffered from pathological hate."

The concept of hate, its surge and increase in modern society and the lack of personal ownership of the hate in our own actions is an interesting and important topic of dialogue.  This "must read" editorial sheds light on the medical and psychological components of prejudice and makes us aware that "pathological hate" and "racial paranoia" are now offical psychiatric diagnoses and potentially treatable with antipsychotic medication and other forms of therapy.  My question is, "How prevalent in our American culture are these 'illnesses?'" 

"Their stereotyped views of blacks, Muslims, Jews, or gays would be viewed as delusional, entirely lacking in any reality, rather than as a normal case of prejudiced thinking."  Take a stroll to the anti-gay websites of MassResistance, VoteOnMarriage, or the Massachusetts Family Institute and do your own layperson's diagnosis of these groups and their Directors/Spokespeople.  Notice I left out Reverend Fred Phelps and the Westborough Baptist Church known for his "God Hates Fags" protests ?  As long as Phelps is getting press, the others can maintain a perceived level of acceptance in society. 

If "hate" is now considered a treatable mental illness much like alcoholism, I guess that would make Reverend Phelps the out of control drunk with multiple DUI's and Brian Camenker, Kris Mineau, Roberto Miranda, Rob Willington et al, just "Social Drinkers..."

Tom Lang, Director

Comments

[John]

Interesting story.

I have no problem with judges granting lighter sentences in light of mitigating circumstances.

[John]

I hit "post" too soon.

I wanted to add that "case-by-case" is essential.

We must not fall into trap of trying to make the "punishement fit the crime" and remove descretion from the curts.

[The Patriot]

Most people who oppose traditional marriage are not haters. They are people who have thousands of years of history and culture behind them as proof that they are right.

The overwhelming majority of successful cultures have defined marriage as between a man and a woman.

To say that this is hateful goes against all reason.

Again, true believers simply hate the sin, not the sinner.

Do not confuse racial bigotry with sexual preference.

[The Patriot]

Once again, KTN is in bed with the likes of Fred Phelps and the KKK.

The extreme elements on
both sides are weeded out by most folks.

Most people know that you are just as bad as Phelps. Your histronics may not be as loud, but your tactics are similar.

You aim to hunt people down and harass them because of your radical agenda.

The only real difference is your signage.

[John Hosty]

Keep to those lies, just make sure you don't answer any questions about specifics. Fear is so powerful a tool you'll need no other....unless we use the truth.

[Your F***ing MOM]

MAN,

I am for to hot lesbians getting it on as much as the next guy, but really fagso you really like pulling your dick out covered in shit? How can you like that and want to
marry it? For me I will take a nice warm, wet pussy any day.

But Alas, I am for fag marriage let all the good looking guys marry all the other good looking guys meanwhile all the butch dike ugly fat chicks can eat carpet.

You silly fags got it so wrong with your love bullshit. This is exactly what is wrong with America, we entertain stupid shit when we should be concering ourselves with killing towel heads. Really is this the biggest problem that we have right now wether or not faggots can get married, while some guy in a cave (with water dripping on his head) is plotting all of out deaths. GROW UP GET A CLUE!!!! BUSH RU
LES!!!!b

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[John]

"Really is this the biggest problem that we have right now wether or not faggots can get married"

I agree completely. It is total waste of time and resouces for you to fight and worry about this.

You seem to forget that gay marriage is legal in Massachusetts. It is your side that is fighting to change the law. It is your side that both gung ho for war and in opposition to gay marriage.

You should get your priorities straight.

[The Patriot]

note to "your f***ing mom"

Do us all a favor and call Fred Phelps.
You can hate together.

[Tom Lang]

Now "plagiarism" Patriot???

It was Aaron Toleos who said in a KnowThyNeighbor blog and email blast that said, "the only difference between Kris Mineau, Brian Camenker and Fred Phelps is packaging"

Interesting thing, hate, ignorance and prejudice...it isn't very creative.

[Joe S]

The Patriot Said....

"Again, true believers simply hate the sin, not the sinner."

There is no "SIN" in same sex unions....we do not accept your judgement...nor will we live by your foolish rules....

To say that something has been done for yada yada number of years does not preclude that it is subject to change.

Marriage has NEVER been a stagnant unchanged institution as you infer...it has both changed AND has been improved upon for centuries....

No one believes your LIES Patriot...No one believes your SPIN Patriot.....No one believes YOU Patriot....

So say and do what you wish...it will AVAIL YOU NOTHING IN THE END!....NOTHING!

[John Hosty]

I wonder if any post is too far for this blog, or is this now an extension of Jerry Springer?

[John Hosty]

Can anyone tell me what wordage needs to be used in order to qualify as a verbal hate crime?

[John]

I don't believe any verbiage qualifies as a hate crime.

A direct threat of violence is a different story.

[Ferma LeBush]

Merriam-Webster Online defines a hate crime as:
Main Entry: hate crime
Function: noun
: any of various crimes (as assault or defacement of property) when motivated by hostility to the victim as a member of a group (as one based on color, creed, gender, or sexual orientation)

Assault can be both verbal and physical:
Main Entry: 1as·sault
Pronunciation: &-'solt
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English assaut, from Anglo-French, from Vulgar Latin *assaltus, from assalire
1 a : a violent physical or verbal attack b : a military attack usually involving direct combat with enemy forces c : a concerted effort (as to reach a goal or defeat an adversary)
2 a : a threat or attempt to inflict offensive physical contact or bodily harm on a person (as by lifting a fist in a threatening manner) that puts the person in immediate danger of or in apprehension of such harm or contact.

[John Hosty]

Thanks Ferma LeBush.

[Daryl]

Joe S:
"Again, true believers simply hate the sin, not the sinner."

There is no "SIN" in same sex unions....we do not accept your judgement...nor will we live by your foolish rules.

Joe it is not the judement of man that should concern you. The lord does not send anyone to hell but leaves the choice to you. Accept Him or reject Him...all YOUR choice. There is sin in same sex marriages (God does not approve homosexuality). it is not just homosexuality but all sins. There is no differance in sin. One is equal to another....sin is sin in God's eyes. yes you can deny it and even say there is no God but one day you will find out there is and hope that is a happy day for you and not the most devestating day imaginable. Your choice buddy.

[John Hosty]

I genuinely want to make that choice, but you are standing in my way. I want to marry Ray and see for myself who is right about God, but I can't if you vote away gay marriage. Its like someone saying they are doing something for your own good. Most people would say thank you for being concerned, but mind your own business. All I ask of my neighbor is not to be a burden to me. I feel burdened by your personal beliefs being enforced as law, and I should not have to according to the First Amendment.

[Ferma LeBush]

Daryl said:
"The lord does not send anyone to hell but leaves the choice to you. Accept Him or reject Him...all YOUR choice. There is sin in same sex marriages (God does not approve homosexuality). it is not just homosexuality but all sins"

Daryl, love between same sex couples is not a sin. Abuse is a sin, be it hetero or homosexual. Love is not a sin.

Religious abuse, of which you are guilty, is a sin.

There are many gay and lesbians who have indeed accepted Christ, and know in their hearts that they are loved unconditionally by God *as they are*. Human sexuality is God-given and natural.
"There is sin in same sex marriages"
There is absolutely *nothing* in the bible to support your opinion.
"(God does not approve homosexuality)"
Do you know the mind of God?
"yes you can deny it and even say there is no God but one day you will find out there is and hope that is a happy day for you and not the most devestating day imaginable. Your choice buddy."

Sigh. A poor attempt to bolster your own convictions and beliefs.

Would you like a pair of pliers to remove the 2 x 4 that's stuck in *your* eye?

Cheers!

Ferma.

ps: You're welcome, Mr. Hosty! :)

[John]

Ferma,

You bring out something that I have only recently become aware of.

"There are many gay and lesbians who have indeed accepted Christ, and know in their hearts that they are loved unconditionally by God"

Until very recently, I did not appreciate how difficult it is to reconcile what passes for Christianity with Jesus's message.

I have since been visiting gay Christian blogs, and I am struck by the pain and suffering that these people have endure.

These gay Christians are caught between a rock and a hard place.

[Ferma LeBush]

"These gay Christians are caught between a rock and a hard place."

I agree, John.
However, IMHO I believe that Gay Christians (and we do exist, despite the lies of the extremist talebangelicals)should look to the Rock rather than the Hard Place.

Peace,

Ferma :)

[The Patriot]

Here is a good example of how delusional the media can be while promoting the gay agenda.

The author assumes that the Entertainment industry is the the bell weather institution that defines a culture.

The LA Times thinks Hollywood is the moral center of the USA!

No wonder why these old media warhorses are falling faster everyday.

By the way, who the hell is Lance Bass?

Gay Marriage Gets Even

Keep the confetti handy, because the tide has turned on same-sex unions.

By David Ehrenstein, DAVID EHRENSTEIN maintains a blog at fablog.ehrensteinland.com.
August 8, 2006

GAYMARRIAGE in the United States is on the ropes and fighting for its legal and political life. In the last year alone, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger vetoed a same-sex marriage bill in California; the supreme courts of New York, Washington and Georgia upheld marriage bans; and at least a dozen states have passed, or are working on, anti-gay-marriage laws.

True, gay and lesbian couples residing in Massachusetts can get hitched, but gone are the heady days of 2004 when scores of male and female couples dashed up the steps of San Francisco's City Hall to say their respective "I do's."

But take heart. Lance Bass, a singer with the now-defunct boy band N'Sync, has come out of the closet, disclosing to People magazine two weeks ago that he's in a "very stable relationship" with actor/model and reality television star Reichen Lehmkuhl. Upon hearing this news, the first word that popped into my head was "even!"

"Seinfeld" fans doubtless recall the 1994 episode when Jerry, in contrast to the ever-roiling fortunes of George, Elaine and Kramer, finds that everything works out "even" for him. If he loses one job, he's sure to get another. If he breaks up with a girlfriend, he'll quickly find a replacement. So it is with gay marriage in the U.S. — even as we lose ground politically, cultural acceptance continues to accelerate.

Same-sexuality, once marginalized, is now part of the mainstream. And it's this mainstreamizing that the radical right longs to reverse — hoping against hope that a federal gay-marriage ban will be a "They Shall Not Pass," leading to a complete socio-sexual 180. The trouble for them is not only that a gay-marriage ban would be shutting the barn door long after the horse has fled — but that the horse in fact has won the Kentucky Derby. When Ian McKellen can blithely bring a boy toy with him to the Oscars, Rosie O'Donnell be afforded a place of honor on "The View," and Anne Heche lose cred for re-embracing heterosexuality, it's pretty clear that, in the immortal words of Judy Garland, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."

The turning point was the AIDS epidemic. As people were dying, closet doors flew open, and the straight world quickly learned that the gay one wasn't as alien as they imagined. In Hollywood, this had a particular effect via the Disney cartoon blockbusters "The Little Mermaid," "Beauty and the Beast" and "Aladdin." Because many of the leading Disney animators were gay, rival studios lured talent with the promise of same-sex spousal benefits. Faster than Aladdin's genie, this practice went industrywide, with a once-reluctant Disney falling right in line, much to the chagrin of Focus on the Family. This year, as the L.A. Times' Patrick Goldstein has noted, three of the four most profitable movies have been animated features; the fourth stars a sexually ambiguous pirate.

Just as telling, a recent New York Daily News item noted that "Sean William Scott turned heads when he showed up at Los Angeles gay bar Heat on the arm of David Geffen." In the past, no newspaper column made mention of gay bars, and had they done so, the stars in question would have fought tooth and nail to scotch the item. Not now. And the reason can be found in a Pew Research Center poll released last week.

"On the subject of gay unions, 56% opposed giving gays the right to marry, but 53% favored allowing gays to enter into legal agreements that provide many of the same rights as married couples," a Reuters summary reported. "There has been an increase … in the proportion of Americans who believe homosexuality is innate — 36%, up from 30% in 2003. Similarly, 49% believed homosexuals cannot be changed to heterosexual, compared to 42% in 2003."

The tide has clearly turned. Pat Buchanan, of all people, is calling for an "armistice" in the culture war and encouraging conservatives to give up fighting for a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage. As columnist and gay dad Dan Savage noted in a New York Times Op-Ed article last month, "I'm confident that one day my son will live in a country that allows his parents to marry. His parents are already married as far as he's concerned, as my boyfriend and I tied the knot in Canada more than a year and a half ago." So until the "Land of the Free" catches up with the Great White North, it's no to gay marriage, but yes to Lance Bass.

Even.

[John Hosty]

From knowthyfactsnotthyneighbors.blogspot.com, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto!" was Dorothy's famous line in The Wizard of Oz." ~"SCIA" July 26

"in the immortal words of Judy Garland, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore." ~"Patriot" on KTN August 9

Running out of material Paul?

[The Patriot]

Here is a good example of how delusional the media can be while promoting the gay agenda.
The author assumes that the Entertainment industry is the the bell weather institution that defines a culture.
The LA Times thinks Hollywood is the moral center of the USA!
No wonder why these old media warhorses are falling faster everyday.
By the way, who the hell is Lance Bass?
Gay Marriage Gets Even
Keep the confetti handy, because the tide has turned on same-sex unions.
By David Ehrenstein, DAVID EHRENSTEIN maintains a blog at fablog.ehrensteinland.com.
August 8, 2006
GAYMARRIAGE in the United States is on the ropes and fighting for its legal and political life. In the last year alone, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger vetoed a same-sex marriage bill in California; the supreme courts of New York, Washington and Georgia upheld marriage bans; and at least a dozen states have passed, or are working on, anti-gay-marriage laws.
True, gay and lesbian couples residing in Massachusetts can get hitched, but gone are the heady days of 2004 when scores of male and female couples dashed up the steps of San Francisco's City Hall to say their respective "I do's."
But take heart. Lance Bass, a singer with the now-defunct boy band N'Sync, has come out of the closet, disclosing to People magazine two weeks ago that he's in a "very stable relationship" with actor/model and reality television star Reichen Lehmkuhl. Upon hearing this news, the first word that popped into my head was "even!"
"Seinfeld" fans doubtless recall the 1994 episode when Jerry, in contrast to the ever-roiling fortunes of George, Elaine and Kramer, finds that everything works out "even" for him. If he loses one job, he's sure to get another. If he breaks up with a girlfriend, he'll quickly find a replacement. So it is with gay marriage in the U.S. — even as we lose ground politically, cultural acceptance continues to accelerate.
Same-sexuality, once marginalized, is now part of the mainstream. And it's this mainstreamizing that the radical right longs to reverse — hoping against hope that a federal gay-marriage ban will be a "They Shall Not Pass," leading to a complete socio-sexual 180. The trouble for them is not only that a gay-marriage ban would be shutting the barn door long after the horse has fled — but that the horse in fact has won the Kentucky Derby. When Ian McKellen can blithely bring a boy toy with him to the Oscars, Rosie O'Donnell be afforded a place of honor on "The View," and Anne Heche lose cred for re-embracing heterosexuality, it's pretty clear that, in the immortal words of Judy Garland, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."
The turning point was the AIDS epidemic. As people were dying, closet doors flew open, and the straight world quickly learned that the gay one wasn't as alien as they imagined. In Hollywood, this had a particular effect via the Disney cartoon blockbusters "The Little Mermaid," "Beauty and the Beast" and "Aladdin." Because many of the leading Disney animators were gay, rival studios lured talent with the promise of same-sex spousal benefits. Faster than Aladdin's genie, this practice went industrywide, with a once-reluctant Disney falling right in line, much to the chagrin of Focus on the Family. This year, as the L.A. Times' Patrick Goldstein has noted, three of the four most profitable movies have been animated features; the fourth stars a sexually ambiguous pirate.
Just as telling, a recent New York Daily News item noted that "Sean William Scott turned heads when he showed up at Los Angeles gay bar Heat on the arm of David Geffen." In the past, no newspaper column made mention of gay bars, and had they done so, the stars in question would have fought tooth and nail to scotch the item. Not now. And the reason can be found in a Pew Research Center poll released last week.
"On the subject of gay unions, 56% opposed giving gays the right to marry, but 53% favored allowing gays to enter into legal agreements that provide many of the same rights as married couples," a Reuters summary reported. "There has been an increase … in the proportion of Americans who believe homosexuality is innate — 36%, up from 30% in 2003. Similarly, 49% believed homosexuals cannot be changed to heterosexual, compared to 42% in 2003."
The tide has clearly turned. Pat Buchanan, of all people, is calling for an "armistice" in the culture war and encouraging conservatives to give up fighting for a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage. As columnist and gay dad Dan Savage noted in a New York Times Op-Ed article last month, "I'm confident that one day my son will live in a country that allows his parents to marry. His parents are already married as far as he's concerned, as my boyfriend and I tied the knot in Canada more than a year and a half ago." So until the "Land of the Free" catches up with the Great White North, it's no to gay marriage, but yes to Lance Bass.
Even.

[Joe S]

Daryl.... you are a MORON!

PERIOD!

No one said there is NO GOD....just that there is no PROOF that he gives a CRAP about same sex marriage.....Jesus NEVER mentions homosexuality....you would think he would have since he is the SON of GOD and it was all around him (including some of his diciples!)

Get a life...and don't you dare judge me or dare to ever presume that you can preach some kind of religious word to ME! I am saved in the eyes of God...and that drives you crazy...you and your fellow evangelical FILTH....

Don't talk to me anymore...I have nothing to say to you again!

[John]

Jesus himself may well have been gay. There was in the early church some serious debate of some passages that appear in the ealiest copies of Mark.