KnowThyNeighbor Discusses The Observations of Some of Our Straight Allies
The title of this post, "I think GLBT people are way too accomodating" is a direct quote from one of our straight allies, blog commenters and friends here at KnowThyNeighbor. Readers may find John's comment in the Hillary Clinton post dated (April 11th, 2007 12:47 PM) in it's entirety and context.
If I may offer my observations that John was responding to a discussion about Washington State's Legislature passing domestic partnership benefits yesterday which will give same-sex couples legal rights in that state (see article). John apologized in advance if his comments might offend members of the LGBT community and points out that he is "on the outside looking in" but tells us of his wish that there would be enough "like-minded people to take to the streets and demand equality by whatever means necessary." Of course, in the thought that domestic partnership will give LGBT some rights but not the dignity, societal acceptance and valued self-worth that equality would. John is one of those amazing people who understands what true equality means and is able to reach out and work hard that others can join "the club" that he, as a straight, married American man, is given free admission to.
This is not the first time that I have heard such sage advice coming from the straight community. KnowThyNeighbor's own director, Aaron Toleos, who has been to me and the LGBT community more than just an ally or an activist but a true inspiration has spoken similar words on many an occasion. Aaron says, "You (meaning the LGBT community) need to fight like equality means something to you!" And he has said something which if taken out of context would most certainly upset many in our community, "You need to start acting like straight people when you fight for your rights!" He then qualified this last statement with an example. He said that if anyone were to try to take rights away from him or from his family like they are doing to the LGBT community in this country, he would do anything he could to protect himself and them. He uses this scenario to advocate for LGBT rights when he talks to his straight, married friends and they seem to "get it" immediately.
Both John's and Aaron's enlightened views about LGBT not equivocating when it comes to equal rights are in stark contrast to Today's Boston Globe "Cheney the grandfather gets it right". Here Derrick Z. Jackson calls Vice President Cheney "a credit to grandfathers everywhere" for his love of his lesbian daughter, Mary,and soon to be grandchild, while in just a few paragraph's earlier Jackson writes,
"Cheney is indeed a poster dad for the nation's struggle to respect same-sex couples. Like many parents, he accepts and loves his child, regardless of sexual orientation. Yet, like many an American, he agonizes how openly to support people like his child."
We all know that we mostly cannot choose our families and certainly we cannot choose who are fathers are, but if we could, our fathers would be exactly like John and Aaron NOT Dick Cheney. What a wonderful world it would be if parents were fully accepting of their children, loved them unconditionally and showed them, by example, that they should fight for everyone's right to equality like our John and Aaron. And didn't agonize about how "openly to support" them.
Tom Lang, Co-Director